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Q & A with Sue Blaney; author of You’re Empowered! Parenting Teens with Conviction, Communication and Love Q: Why did you create this audio program and what can parents hope to get out of it? A: Sue Blaney: Parents of teenagers are incredibly busy, and many are too stretched for time to do much reading or join a parent discussion group. This program is designed so they can listen on the go – in the car, at the gym, whatever can fit into their schedule. The workbook that accompanies the program can be viewed separately to help reinforce the points and make it all the more concrete and actionable. Q: “You’re Empowered!” is an interesting name for the program. Why did you give it this name? A: Sue Blaney: Over the years I’ve seen many parents of teens that feel unsure of their role. It’s almost like they are looking for permission to parent. My message is they already have that. They already are empowered. They need to gain confidence in their role and this program will help them do that. Q: What are the biggest challenges parents of teenagers face? A: Sue Blaney: I hear parents ask three basic questions. They ask: 1.) “What’s ‘normal?’’”They want to know what “normal” teenage behavior looks like. 2.) “Am I doing this right? What are the rules?” They are looking for some guidance and insight on how to parent teens today. 3.) “How can I keep my teen from engaging in risky behavior?” Parents have a real fear about their kids getting involved with alcohol, drugs, and early or unprotected sexual activity. You say to parents “Communication is the key to your success.” How do you help parents with their communication? A: Sue Blaney: My program will heighten their awareness on several levels. First, by addressing the “What’s normal” question I mentioned above, I share information about where kids are developmentally, and that helps explain a lot of behavior that parents can find puzzling. When they understand what is behind their teen’s behavior, it can improve communication right there. Additionally, we examine common mistakes parents make and obstacles that infringe on good communication, along with strategies to get past these communication inhibitors. We look at communication both strategically and tactically. Q: What are the most common communication mistakes that parents make? A: Sue Blaney: There are three: 1.)
Failure to change their communication style to reflect their teen’s growing
maturity. Q: How can communication influence whether teens get involved in risky behavior? Isn’t that more a function of their peer influences? A: Sue Blaney: The number one deterrent to kids abusing drugs and alcohol is parents! Teens care deeply what their parents think, and don’t want to disappoint them. This becomes a communication issue because parents who listen to their teens can create an environment where teens can speak honestly… giving parents much better opportunities to provide realistic guidance and keep their kids safe. Q: Tell us about the Parents’ Action Tool on the back cover and how it is used. A: Sue Blaney: This is a simple, but profoundly helpful device. Parents of teens are forever facing new situations where they must make a value judgment or response…and there often isn’t a clear “right” or “wrong” choice. These questions can help to guide parents to come to a considered decision that is in synch with their values. They won’t need all 7 of the questions at once, but can pick and choose the ones that will help with their particular situation. I give many suggestions and examples for using this tool in the audio program. For further information contact Sue Blaney at 978-264-0692 or 1-800-234-2150. Click here for press release Click here for Parenting Tips from this program workbook ###
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